Stolen Sista-Mama-Daughter- the other story of Jessica
Targeted, unhoused, on the run, doing things I call underground economic strategies, to survive the Intentional poverty, present and historical trauma rampant in Amerikkklan. This is the other narrative about stolen, Po’Lice murdered sister-mama-daughter Jessica Nelson-Williams, cornered and murdered by the paid agents of the state (PoLice) in the Bayview on May 19th 2016 . The terrifying but very true aspect of her murder is that everyday of her life she was under surveillance. Jessica, like Mayan, unhoused father Luis Gongora Pat, and Papa Bear and so many other unhoused peoples in struggle, was already on the Po’Lice internal memos, their watch lists. And most tragically, the so-called stolen car she was supposedly in, was just the excuse to create a conclusion deeply in the making for awhile. The Po'Lice and their own gentriFUKation project.
When I saw her face,I knew that I knew her. It was an aching kind of knowing, rooted in pain, like the kind of pain so many of us poor, unhoused mamas share when we spot another unhoused family member in deep struggle. And yet i still couldent place our meeting. Then my sister Queenandi XSheba, fellow poverty skola and member of the welfareQUEEN’s at POOR Magazine also saw Jessica and recognized her and then i remembered. It was a day not so long ago while still at POOR’ Magazine’s tenderloin (TL) location. She had come in to get support from our Courtwatch project, which is a humble poor/houseless mamas and fathers led project to support families who are struggling to deal with the horror of Child Protective Service (CPS). My mama Dee started it when we had CPS in our life due to a family crisis. Every family we tried to support were, like us, almost destroyed by the kkkorts and their racist, classist decisions, expectations, judgements and hoops.
Jessica was in that kind of grief, and impossible situation, that is alomost indescribable, unable to make things better, lost in its endlessness. Unable to jump through the insane CPS hoops and yet heart-broken by losing her babies. I remember telling Jessica that that the CPS system was rigged and set up to make money from the removal of our babies from our homes. I told her something comrade Dorsey Nunn told me and my mama when we were dealing with the same grief, think the Po’Lice
I always remember Jessica's beauty, her optimism even throughout the struggle, how sweet and gentle she was, and how heartbroken she was and how she was almost resigned to that heart-break. How she was caught in the “life” , when the things you start doing to survive, sometimes become you. Things you do to survive, because of systematic racism, institutionalized criminalization that put people in poverty and keep them there so they can continue to keep the poverty industry wheel turning.
Throughout our life in houselessness and struggle, both as a child with my disabled mixed race mama and later as an adult with my own sun, houseless again, i had been in and out of that terror that nothing was going to get better, that we were caught in the impossible situaiton, that we were stuck. I felt so many times i would never get out, never be able to make things ok. I did more and more things that led to more and more crisis. These positions of impossibility is why we poor and criminalized mamas do the welfareQUEEN’s project. To speak and teach and liberate our fellow sisters and brothers who are criminalized for the sole act of being a poor mama. From food stamps to proof of income forms, From drug tests, to po;Lice harassment, our liberation also begins with our own understanding. It is one of the reasons we poor mamaz in struggle and resistance are coming out with a 2016-17 welfareQUEEN's play, which will be dedicated to Jessica.
I cry for Jessica now like i cry for my mama, and so many other sister-mama-daughters taken from us way too soon. I pray deeply that maybe her spirit is a little less scared and no longer has to run. That she is watching over her babies from the other side and that her loving spirit can rest in love.